Thursday, June 21, 2012

It's Not That Easy Being..... (you fill in the blank)

I have 2 daughters, and 2 bonus sons.  This summer, 1 daughter is in San Diego with her grandparents, and we have the sons every other week.  This week is one of the weeks we have them.  Last week, Mr. B's ex-wife took Ernie (who is 10) to the doctor for his yearly check up, and to have some tests done because he is quite over-weight.  He weighs 132 pounds.  The doctor called back yesterday and said the blood work has raised some concerns and he wants to meet with "us".  So... it's not easy #1 - do I go to this appointment?  I have thoughts, I have opinions, and I want to hear what's said.  But the she-beast would be less than happy.  And what are those opinions?  Those opinions are that Ernie needs psychological counseling.  For 2 days now while helping to clean up after my 4-year-olds at VBS, I have watched Ernie pick pieces of food up off the ground, pretend to throw them away, but actually eat them.  There's just no way that's ok.  That's more than just "liking" food, right??????  It's hard to be the "new" guy.  I think I see things that Mr. B doesn't see anymore, or chooses not to see.  So... I should be at that appointment, right?  But I shouldn't... right???????  Ack.

3 comments:

Tracy P. said...

What a dilemma! I would think your best opportunity to advocate for Ernie is with his dad. His mom might tend to lean away from your opinions simply because they're yours. Mr. B will be most able to listen well and speak freely if he's not stressed over the three way dynamic. BUT, if you do go, it might be fine if all you do is listen and direct questions to the dr. If you don't go, you could brief Mr. B with questions you would want to ask (of course, you don't know the news), and tell him you're going to ask him for the answers when he gets home. That might help him hear differently.

But then, what do I know? Hope Ernie gets some excellent help!

Melissa B. said...

I agree with Tracy. You don't want to cause further grief, especially if Ernie faces substantial challenges down the road. Mr. B is with you now - he'll appreciate your input, I'm sure!

brainella said...

What about discussing all your questions and concerns with Mr. B first, just to get a gauge on where he's at -- then discuss whether you should go to the doctor's appointment. If you don't go you may not get all the VITAL information about what is necessary for his health especially since he's staying with you for a week at a time. This is about Ernie, not his parents -- even though the ex wants to make it so.

This situation sucks. Good luck, Lizzie. :-)